From a young age, I understood the deep need for harmony within myself, in my relationships, and in the world around me. I became the peacemaker, the one who held space, mediated conflict, and carried the emotional weight for others. I believed, at my core, that we’re here to love one another, not to live in isolation or division.

But over time, that constant giving came at a cost. I felt the heaviness of others’ pain seep into my own body. My light, though bright for others, started to dim. My cup was empty.

In 2018, four years into living in Seattle, I found myself at a breaking point. I had lost two great loves at a young age and was spiraling through cycles of addiction: alcohol, nicotine, sex, screens. I was searching for something to hold onto. Then, a simple letter from my mom changed everything. She asked, “Have you thought about believing in a higher power? Some kind of faith to hold you during the dark times?”

That question cracked something open in me.

My journey toward healing began. I found a partner and a community who saw and accepted all of me, and still challenged me to face my shadows. I leaned into daily practices that brought me back into my body: dance, yoga, singing, trail running, gratitude journaling. I returned to school for permaculture, and in 2022, I met my mentor Susan Pullen through her program Ways of the Soul. There, I encountered the part of me I’d long buried: the inner healer who’d been neglected while tending to everyone else.

Healing, I’ve learned, isn’t linear. It’s messy and beautiful. It’s grief and joy, trust and surrender. It’s sitting with the tender, young parts of ourselves and finally listening.

Today, I live in an intentional community on the Washington peninsula. I’m in healthy, polyamorous relationships. I garden. I grow. I feel more like myself than I ever have: confident, empowered, and grounded in love. The little Becca who believed peace between people was possible? She’s still here, and she’s thriving.

I now offer my guidance to others walking the path of healing. Through connecting with your inner child, feeling your full emotional range, and reclaiming your truth, I believe you can rediscover that thread of hope, too. The journey isn’t easy, but it’s worth every step.